Feelin Like A Kite

"Me and Mary Jane got a really nice friendship."

SOPA — recipe for a SOUP OF WORLD DOMINATION!!

on January 31, 2012

Lamar Smith is the Republican U.S. Representative from Texas who initiated the bill known as SOPA, or supposedly the Stop Online Piracy Act. Along with the Senate’s PIPA bill (PROTECT IP Act), SOPA has brought the issue of online video piracy and streaming to national attention. Many Americans are in an uproar because SOPA was successful in shutting down major websites engaged in online piracy such as the beloved Megavideo.

Humans have the tendency to turn to illegal or immoral behavior to establish a sense of nonconformity and use impulsive/compulsive behaviors to validate or numb out their emotions. For example, in the film Stepbrothers (which sadly cannot be viewed anymore on Megavideo), the father, Robert, has a heated argument with the mother, Nancy, and turns to alcohol to escape the feelings attached to the conflict. In the brilliant UK drama Skins, Cassie turns to casual and compulsive sex with both men and women to detach and distract herself from Sid. Likewise, many humans resorted to viewing pirated movies and tv shows online to alleviate feelings of stress, sorrow, or angst. However, after SOPA was passed, people have no other choice but to actually feel their negative emotions (or they could turn to drugs, sex, alcohol, etc., but that requires effort, wits, and cash…) or even worse, actually rent or even BUY movies and discs with seasons of loved sitcoms. Or even watch a limited amount of shows and movies on hulu with dreaded second long COMMERCIALS. AHH THE HORROR!!!! Who has the time and money to sit through commercials and pay for DVDs? Especially in this economic slump?

People have blamed the 2012 Apocalypse for SOPA and the deterioration of the internet that many took for granted. However, humanity does not seem to realize the masterminds behind this evil plan…CATS. They are taking over the world, and they are making the human race suffer, starting with controlling the internet and depriving the population from emotional release. As a matter of fact, SOPA stands for Supremacy Over People and other Animals. Representative Lamar Smith is simply the slave of the kitties, brainwashed to obey their every command. By gaining influence in the U.S. government, a powerhouse in international affairs, the cunning species of cats are taking giants strides in achieving total world domination. The world is not going to end on December 21, 2012. Instead, cats are going to take over the entire universe! People need to realize that cats have already gained control over many aspects of American culture and norm: the internet, Disney movies, popular songs, celebrities, and even the government. Who knows what’s next? Education? The Superbowl? NATIONAL HOLIDAYS?!?!

Everyone needs to start preparing for the day that cats will achieve total control over the world. Watch out! REEROW!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

%d bloggers like this: